Britishness

I often ask myself about my Britishness. I mean like how British am I?
I had a scone the other day and my mother wouldn't let me put jam and cream on it without have a cup of tea so as to make it a cream tea. This at the moment is the level of Britishness that I believe I have reached.

A little while ago the guardian released a British Citizenship Quiz, which is basically a series of 10 questions about 'British' things, such as "Who is the patron saint of Scotland?" and "What is the second largest party in the house of commons called?". To me this is not what makes a person British, I don't really know the history of this country and I have lived here my whole life. Just before writing this post I took the quiz and got 5 out of 10. WHAT THE FUCK! This quiz has the nerve to tell me that I am only half British.
To me being British is not that I know the history of my country or the fact that my memory is bad enough that I don't remember the Queens Jubilee. Being British is different for everybody, for me, being British is my ability to laugh at this video because of just how true it is:

Its the fact that we are so different that there is a YouTube channel dedicated to the different things we do. No matter how cringe worthy it is! This is just one video from the channel and the first one I had the - I don't want to pleasure - but pleasure to watch.

When watching this video, I had to actually pause the video multiple times just to obscenely jester at the screen at the stupidity of not the presenter but the way she is talking like she is talking to a new born baby or a fucking alien from not only a different planet but a different bloody universe!

I'm going to stop talking now as I am just getting more and more irritated by this post! and will soon end up on a rant about shit that has nothing to do with this!

Next time on Thapsal I'm going to try and not rant about something!

Have a good one...

House hunting...

Jesus Christ I have forgotten to post agian...but in my defence a lot of things have happened in the last week...

I'll just get you caught up!

On Monday me my mother and sister went to longleat so we were out for the whole day...although we were slightly disappointed becuase our favorite ice cream shop there closed down, the maze was closed for renovations. We also feel that the park in general has gotten to...commercial?...yeah commercial, I mean of course longleat always has been but now it's almost trying to hard to appeal. Basicly they have themed everything jungley and we don't like it.
Oh and on Monday we also sold our house! Which took bloody long enough if you ask me!

Tuesday and Wednesday were boiling and so we could actually do anything in any way productive for more then 2 seconds. This meant that I could not actually sit in my room to actually write a post.

Down even ask what happened on Thursday because I don't remember!

I am now sat in a hotel room in Yorkshire (it's Friday) becuase we started at 7 this moring drove for hours to get to Kendal where we looked at Kendal college for a tour and I had an interview and was offered a place. And then we had a house viewing, which was about an hour away and we had to get there in 40 minutes...which we managed but we felt sea sick doing it becuase my dad was doing well over the speed limit on country roads that actually follow the land.

And Saturday we have 4 houses that we are going to view so we have a busy day ahead of us. Not only that but we also have to drive back home tonight...yay for traveling!

(Oh and sorry but this will have gone up on Saturday even through I write it on Friday!)

Have a good one...

Penguins

Sorry there was no post yesterday my sisters new phone was coming and my mum was out so I spent the day downstairs playing with the dogs waiting for the door bell to ring. That sounds really sad but its true. Anyway so I spent the day downstairs which means that I didn't have access to my computer hence no post.

And now on to the actual post...

The penguin; a marker of youth.
Whether you automatically think of the flightless bird from Antarctica or the chocolate covered bar from Mcvitie's our childhood was/is filled with penguins.

The true staple of being a child is the ever present ability to laugh at the terrible jokes on the back of a chocolate bar. Or to look at it the other way to grow up is to gain the ability to keep a straight face when someone reads a joke off of the back of a penguin.

I know for example that non of my forensics class has grown up, this includes the 40 something teacher, because a friend of mine brings out penguin bar and read the joke:

"Why are penguins so hard to get along with?

Because they are always fishing for compliments."

The fact that my entire forensics class at college, so most of them are 17, laughed at this joke should tell you something. We are not ready for the real world.

but then I turn round to my family and read the joke:

"Why can't penguins fly?

Because they are covered in chocolate."

My dad and brother did nothing, my sister said the answer at the same time as me and my mother said that it would make more sense  if it said that they where chocolate bars not just covered in chocolate.

 

Something that is always constant about our love for penguins is that if we go to a zoo with penguins we will spend the longest time watching them. Some zoos have got around this - the crowd around the penguins - by having the penguins live in an enclosed building so that you can only see them if you do in. and putting conveyer belts round the enclosure so that you can't loiter and stop other people from seeing the penguins.

 

 

I have a question for you...do you still laugh at penguin jokes? Are you one of the few that could care less about going to see penguins when going to a zoo?

Don't worry you won't be judged...I'm just intrigued.

 

Have a good one...

Driving...(sorry there was no post yesturday)

I have been learning to drive for a little while now. My dad has been taking me out on Sundays and I have been learning to drive in our Fiat 500.
Now I have only recently have I actually become old enough to apply for my provisional licence - Don't worry I haven't been driving on actual roads, they are more like dirt tracks. But anyway, the other day my provisional came through and here the real sucker, I crashed the first time I drove after getting my licence.

I have been driving amazingly up to this point. I can do most things, I have a little issue with parallel parking but then who doesn't. Basically my dad ran out of things to teach me on the tracks that I could go on, and the large open areas that are there the army are playing silly buggers on.

So we decide that it would be a good idea to take my mums car out for a drive. We did this for several reasons. A) it would save the suspension on the fiat (as my mums car is a 4x4 ford) and B) it would allow me to try and drive something different, something a little larger.

So after driving around for a while trying to find a place that wasn't over run my the military, my dad pulls over to the side of the road and we swap so that I can start driving.
Its all well and good to start off with, we drive down nice road, I get used to the fact that the car is a little bit more responsive because of the 4 wheel drive but all is good.
We then get to s roundabout type thing, and we go round it, then my dad says "stop and reverse back round it" this is fine, the side of the car the could be hit by the wooden poles surrounding the roundabout is on my side so I can see them coming and can avoid them.
Then we turn around and the dreaded words of "now do it the other way" come. This means that the poles are on the other side of the car and I have to somehow see where they are in just the passenger side window. (Can we also bare in mind that I'm driving at 7:30 in the evening so the sun is setting straight in front of the car).
I begin to back the car up and I think it is going well, there are no poles in the mirror, the reversing censor isn't going off, everything great. Then I get a "Stop Stop Stop" for my dad as I have reversed into a pole.

My dads not mad, he gets me out of the mess, (although I have managed to dent the passenger side back door and taken off the handle to said door) he's not made. In fact we have a laugh about it, he understands that I could not see the pole in the mirror because of the sun on the pole - according to me there was nothing there - my dad even says that it was about time that one of us crashed. Any way we then drive around a bit more (no more reversing, thank god), make a few more jokes, all it good.

That is until we get home and tell my mum.

She's not happy, at all.
There is a reason her car is always covered in dirt, its because its the car we bought to fit the dogs in, it is affectionately named 'the truck' because that's all it is. It is used slowly for ferrying to dogs around. My mother gets stupidly attached to her cars, previously she has had the two newest beetles named 'Barnaby' and 'Buster' (proof of attachment), her car now is called 'the truck' (proof she should care). But she does, do you know what her first words were, "well I guess I should just be glad that it wasn't me beetle", I wouldn't have taken her fucking car out if it was her beetle, the hole point of it was that it was a cheap ca to fit dogs in. There was no other use, because if I have taken her beetle out I might as well have just taken the fiat or even my dads Jag.


So long story short, when I got back after driving last night I wasn't in the mood to post anything because if I wasn't feel bad enough about reversing into a pole my mother made me feel worse.
That is why you didn't get anything yesterday.

Now I'm in a bad mood again, so if you wanna cheer me up how about you comment something stupid you have done whilst driving. I could really use a laugh now.
Thanks...

Have a good one...

Spiders - I'll keep the swaering to minimum!

A little story for you on this fine day...

I get a lot of spiders in my bathroom as the window spends a lot of its time on the latch or slightly open so as to let all of the hot air out after a shower because we cannot leave the door open because the dogs go in the bin.
So anyway I often wont notice the spiders and that's fine, until of course they sneak up on you and then its like HOLY FUCK SHIT WHAT IN THE NAME OF GODS GREEN EARTH WAS THAT! and the hole house comes running to your aid - well they are suppose to anyway but my family don't care so no, I deal with spiders alone.

But there was this one time when I saw the spider because I was opening the door and it fell off of its web behind the door and freaked me out and I thought "Aww I'm sorry little spider", basically I felt sorry for the spider so didn't kill it.
I look up to where its web was and saw that there was another spider walking along the wall to the web - I don't know which spider owned the web - anyway this spider then started climbing back up the wall towards its web. It was still going when I left the bathroom.
A little while later I realised I had left my phone in the bathroom where I put it on the side of the bath after taking out of my back pocket so it didn't fall in to the toilet. so I went back into the bathroom to get it. I remembered the spiders and looked up and there was only one - and I could have sworn it was bigger now - and I looked around and could see the other one.

So to this day I do not know whether a spider lost its home/was eaten because of me. Or if a spider got a nice meal of another spider because of me.
To be honest I kind of feel bad either way...not that I like spiders.


So that was my story...Do you have any spider stories or anything like that.

Have a good one...

P.S. I will be doing a review on Now You See Me 2 this evening because I am going to see it later today.